Who changed the locks on the notice board anger

Wigan Today: With all the world's problems solved, local groups come to fisticuffs over the lock on the parish notice board

There will be deaths over this, mark my words.

This is exactly the kind of non-story which made me start this site. Well played, everybody.

Spotter's Badge: Linzi, Michael

Stolen letters anger

Guernsey Press: Thieves steal letters from community centre sign to make it spell swears

And I can reveal that the swear was not inadjacent to See You Next Tuesday.

Spotter's Badge: Tony

Cross country scammers anger

Oxford Mail: Watch out for scammers, says anti-scam bloke

He's got that miserable face because they found out their Trading Standards car is actually two old cars welded together. Three, actually.

Council graffiti anger

Oxford Mail: Oxford City council to get tough on graffiti

The original headline was "Authorities search for solutions as graffiti doubles in a year", but I expect they found the solvents they needed in B&Q

Road sign anger

Fleet News and Mail: Fleet in Hampshire, where even the road signs are furious

"Will cutting speed limit make a difference?" the story asks. We all know the answer is going to be "no".

Dog poop anger triple bill

Dundee Courier: Poo on the football pitch

And...

Dundee Telegraph: Still poo on the football pitch

Nottingham Post: Your dog wants a poo? It's got to come through me first

Oh, wait.

Dog poo enforcement anger

About My Area: Council officials about to hit the streets and crack down on dog mess

That ridiculously good looking chap on the right is in charge of dog clamping. If he catches your dog crapping in the street, the clamp goes on, no questions asked.

Footie pitch dog ban anger

Oakleigh Monash Leader: Dogs could be banned from artificial football pitch

Too right, look at the mess that bloody great dingo's left

Spotter's Badge: Rob J

Loom band anger

Llanelli Star: Warning over potentially 'toxic' loom bands

As opposed to warning over 'potentially shit' loom bands, which tat shops have bought in their thousands and can't get rid of.

Spotter's Badge: Rob

Probabtion officers anger

Swindon Adver: Probation officers to strike because of THATCHER

Some fine individual performances here

See also:

 Lancashire Telegraph: Legal Aid lawyers strike because of THATCHER

Thatcher, everybody. THATCHER.

Spotter's Badge: Paul, Karen

Dog poo paint campaign anger

Spenborough Guardian: Dog warden wages war on dog mess through the medium of paint

Much like Rembrandt's 'scat period'

Spotter's Badge: Rob J

Zombie advert anger

Brighton Argus: Zombie bus ads investigated for being "too frightening"

Dunno - looks pretty much normal for Brighton

Spotter's Badge: Simon

Dog poo in the park anger

Banbridge Leader: Spray-paint campaign against dog turds

Also: People who drive vans in the park

Orange dog poo anger

Essex Echo: Dog poo to be sprayed orange to shame owners

Because if there's one place where there's loads of orange stuff in tins, it's Essex

Spotter's Badge: Barry, Cora

Asbestos dump anger

Worksop Guardian: Anger as asbestos dumped at the side of road

Bloke on the left looks FURIOUS (and is about to be snaffled by the grabber)

Spotter's Badge: Broad

Huge sacks of jobbies anger

Brighouse Echo: School's plea for dog owners to pick up after their dogs

Mine did one that actual size this morning. And he's a Jack Russell.

Spotter's Badge: Ross

Flooded park anger

Halifax Courier: Council vows to deal with flooding at park

My suggestion, for what it's worth: Community Swimming Pool

Spotter's Badge: Ross

Pain in the - oh-ho! - GLASS anger

Wigan Today: Anger as booze bottles dumped in lane

Holy Moly - that's a lot of cider

Flooded lay-by anger

Henley Standard: Flooded lay-by 'a danger to road users'

Also, according to the picture, KILLER SHARKS

School street light think of the kiddiewinks anger

Northants Telegraph: School governor angry as street light switched off near school

THINK OF THE KIDDIEWINKS KLAXON

Spotter's Badge: Victor