Tuesday, October 06, 2015

Lack of respect hairy vicar anger

Essex Echo: Vicar upset after yobs rip up remembrance wreaths

Seriously, catch these scrotes, and get this man to a barber.

Spotter's Badge: Barry

One-man bollard anger

Burton Mail: Man vows to become one-man bollard to protect pedestrians

When he dies, dip his body in acrylic plastic, and he can have his wish forever

Spotter's Badge: Simon

Trapped in car showroom anger

Derby Telegraph: Couple trapped on garage forecourt after staff lock up and go home

He escaped. His wife is still in there.

Spotter's Badge: Rachel

Monday, October 05, 2015

Outdoor seating anger

Hull Daily Mail: Vanessa Delicatessen barred from having outside seating by council

Disappointed to learn that she's not actually called Vanessa Delicatessen. CHANGE YOUR NAME.

Spotter's Badge: L0wey

Smashed cars anger

Portsmouth News: Yobs go on the rampage in Southsea

Southsea! This is on a par with armed insurrection.

Spotter's Badge: Jonathan

Wedding reception anger

Bournemouth Echo: Wedding plans thrown into chaos as venue owners flee to Canada

Here's a shocker - not one comment out of three dozen calling the victims "attention seekers".

Vengeful deity broke my TV anger

Somerset Guardian: Shop staff tell customer fly damage to his TV screen is "an act of God"

Deliberately turn off Songs of Praise halfway through, and that's what you can expect. God's a git sometimes.

Spotter's Badge: Andrew, Everybody

Sunday, October 04, 2015

Polytunnel anger

Shropshire Star: Residents don't like plans for more polytunnels on farm land

But it's not the polytunnels they're objecting to, it's ...err... mud on the road. Yes. Musd on the road, and not the polytunnels. Honest.

Spotter's Badge: Gordy

Carnival clown anger

Cambridge News: Carnival committee member upset after he discovers his colleagues don't think much of his clown mascot idea

Wondering out loud here - What do you think gave them that idea? I - for one - think a clown character based on a vampire being caught out by the rising sun is a fabulous idea.

Spotter's Badge: Michael

Diversion sign anger

Essex Chronicle: Driver claims to be confused by late-night diversions

Good quality head-scratching and pointing. Otherwise I might not have known what this story is about

Spotter's Badge: Joe

Saturday, October 03, 2015

Pensioner's disgusting back alley anger

Lancashire Telegraph: "When I said 'STAY AWAY FROM MY BINS', I didn't mean the bin men as well"

Who - we ask - will clean up this poor old lady's disgusting back alleyway? Oh, my sides, all that innuendo is killing me.

Spotter's Badge: Karen

Why do we have to fold up our pushchair to get on the bus anger

Hull Daily Mail: Why oh why oh why?

And all the sympathy you'd expect from the armchair warriors in the comments

Spotter's Badge: Ian

Stolen motorbike anger

Bromley News Shopper: Man's £6,000 motorbike stolen from outside police station

Why - I hear you ask - is he is wearing leathers if his motorbike has been stolen?

It is simple, and I am shocked at your insensitivity --- THOSE ARE HIS ONLY CLOTHES

Spotter's Badge: Rob C

Friday, October 02, 2015

Hideously and freakishly ugly baby doll anger

Dudley News: Police broke into our car thinking there was a baby trapped inside when it was only a doll

OK, we'll bite, just how realistic is said baby doll?

AAAAARGH! Destroy it! Destroy the Hell Child with fire and sticks!

Spotter's Badge: Tim

Wrong map lelvel crossing anger

Oxford Mail: Residents fear 'Berlin Wall' as map shows level crossing could be closed

And there, buried near the bottom of the story, is the revelation that it was a mis-print. That's two minutes of my life I want back.

Spotter's Badge: Richard