Sub-standard grass anger

Mordialloc Chelsea Leader: Strewth! You can't expect us to play on this grass, it's as dry as a witch's tit

Actual quotes, there*

*Lie

Spotter's Badge: Timothy

Please don't open a knocking shop next door anger

Mordialloc Chelsea Leader: Brothel approved next door to company offices

You can't complain*, it even looks like a bordello

Spotter's Badge: Rob J

*Actually, you can

Smoking on the beach anger

Mordialloc Chelsea Leader: Beachgoers urged to 'Beat the Butt' 

Heh. Beat the butt.

Spotter's Badge: Rob J

Broken sign anger

Mordialloc Chelsea Leader: Woman wants illuminated sign fixed despite the rising cost

Dressed entirely in a rubber tyre. Kinky.

Spotter's Badge: Rob J

Men's Shed Anger

Mordialloc Chelsea Leader: Men's shed club needs a new shed

Somebody sort one out quick, it's bored men of a certain age wondering the streets that get things like UKIP started.

Spotter's Badge: Rob J

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