Monday, May 31, 2010
Even more World Cup urban myth anger
Streatham Guardian: Disabled footie fan barred from pub over England flag
It's not just political correctness gone mad, it's "political correctness gone berserk"
Spotter's Badge: Gert
Vandalism anger
York Press: Kids squat and point in fury as new park is trashed
I see Sherlock Holmes is in the comments, advocating running dog poo through a DNA test.
There's a blog to be made about inane newspaper comments. Somebody else do it.
Bus theft anger
Southampton Daily Echo: Thieves steal parts from wheelchair bus
So, if you're offered a catalytic converter by a man in a pub, the phone number is this: 999.
That number again: 999
CCTV anger
Bournemouth Echo: Shopkeep to stop giving CCTV footage to police after they can't be arsed to investigate crime
Hit 'em where it hurts. Gob on their doughnuts.
Sunday, May 30, 2010
More World Cup urban myth anger
Worksop Guardian: Bogus cops tell driver to remove England flags
Super 'fed up' posing.
Spotter's Badge: Maggi
Vandalism anger
Waltham Forest Guardian: Vandals wreck public garden
With all-too-predictable "bring back the birch" comment in the "Your Say" section.
Tax Code Anger
This is Somerset: Angry pensioner so angry over his 13 tax codes, he buys a bunch of lottery tickets
Take that, THE MAN!
Spotter's Badge: Robert
Complete lack of perspective anger
Dorset Echo: Locals vow to chain themselves to trees over holiday park plans
"We never had a fence there before and their excuse is to keep paedophiles out. It looks like Auschwitz."
Bloody. Hell's. Teeth.
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Crossover anger
Bexley News Shopper: Householder's fury as council rips up new crossover
Sorry, I don't speak Bexley. What's a crossover?
Spotter's Badge: Martin
Bus gate anger
Oxford Mail: Shopkeeps furious as council decides to enforce traffic laws
A superb double-whammy from the Mail. Jolly well done.
Prison anger (again)
Yellow Advertiser: NIMBYs who were angry in an earlier story still angry
And brilliantly, if they do build a prison in Runwell, all he has to do is to paint over the word "NO" and his van retains its value.
Friday, May 28, 2010
Bogus caller anger
Worcester News: Fury as bogus official asks man for bank details
Tell me, mate. Your bank details are safe with us.
Spotter's Badge: James
Bad e-fit
South Yorks Star: Police search for mobile phone robber
Bloody hell - it's the Green Goblin!
Don't have nightmares.
Spotter's badge: Maggi
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Cock anger
South West Times: Stop dumping your roosters on my wildlife park, says angry bloke
KEEP YOUR COCKS TO YOURSELVES
Spotter's badge: Michelle
College cuts anger
Dorset Echo: Student angry as college cutbacks disrupt her course
"I'd disrupt her course" is THE WRONG THING TO SAY
Recycling anger
Bexley Times: Anger over plans to recycle human poo
It all depends what they're going to be recylcing it into, of course. As a rule of thumb, Bourbon Biscuits = BAD.
Spotter's Badge: Martin
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Football shirt urban myth comes true anger
Dorset Echo: Football fan fuming after being told to remove 'racist' England shirt by police
Ladies: If a police officer tells you he wants you to remove your 'racist' football shirt, he only wants to see your tits. Do not remove your England shirt, unless you want him to see your tits.
That is all.
HOLIDAY HELL anger
Peterborough Today: Angry families reject offer over HOLIDAY HELL
Warning: The punters are going harsh in the comments section. "Paid a fortune for a holiday? Fed raw sewage? That'll be your own fault then"
Boot camp anger
Reading Evening Post: Council bans fitness freak's boot camp from park
Believe me, you'll need a big lump of metal if you want to go for a walk there.
Housing association anger
Chorley Citizen: Anger as tennants hit with wrong charges
And now they're homeless and living in a hedge, you gits.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Weed anger
Star Phoenix (Canada): Upmarket residents dismayed by patch of weeds
"If you could step back. A bit further. A bit further..."
Spotter's Badge: Britt
Hole anger
Mandurah Coastal Times: Holes are the pits, says punning sub-editor
If the bearded guy sings, STOP HIM
Spotter's Badge: Pseudonymph
Golden Arches anger
Metro: Mum's fury as McDonald's Happy Meal comes with cigarette
Too right. She wanted the Hamburglar lighter as well.
Spotter's badge: Julia
HOLIDAY HELL anger, again
South West Times (Aus): Whinging Poms whinge in local rag over HOLIDAY HELL
Somebody send a Red Cross parcel or something, the poor devils
Spotter's Badge: Michelle
Tax demand anger
Bradford Telegraph and Argus: Mum's fury over demand to pay back tax credits
Never mind her - the kid's REALLY cross
Spotter's badge: Wellers
Monday, May 24, 2010
Tourism anger
Dorset Echo: Traders anger as tourist information office finds new home
I've lived in Weymouth for eight years, and it appears that the default position for shopkeepers is furious.
So: Come to sunny Weymouth. See the angry shopkeeps. Make them angrier.
Playground anger
Oxford Mail: Anger as new playground described as 'death trap'
I've been to Didcot. They've been campaigning for a new death trap for YEARS
Spotter's Badge: Laura
Bus fare anger
Bournemouth Echo: Web designer thrown off bus after trying to pay with £20 note
If only there was some sort of secure electronic method of purchasing tickets by means of a network of linked computer systems.
Naaaah.
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Irish money anger
Bournemouth Echo: Punter arrested, handcuffed and helped down a steep flight of concrete stairs over Irish twenty pound note
Important details of this story emerge in the final paragraph, as you'd expect.
Car park anger
Dorset Echo: Driver's fury as visit to DIY store ends in parking fine
"Now - who shall I complain to? The store manager, or the local paper?"
Recycling anger
Essex Echo: Party shop owner enraged over flytipping fine after leaving cardboard box next to bin
She asks: "What kind of commercial waste does a party shop produce?"
Answer: Dead clowns.
Spotter's Badge: Anon
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Cussing anger
Reading Evening Post: Mum's complaint over f***ing kids f***ing swearing on f***ing school bus
F***, yeah. You tell the f***ers.
Contains the all-too-predictable line: "Now, I am no prude but..."
Spotter's Badge: Nowtas
Swimming pool anger
Essex Echo: Dr Feelgood guitarist joins battle to save island pool
So, that makes him Dr FeelBAD about the whole issue, then.
Yeah, I'll shut up.
Spotter's Badge: @Satanspants
Car parking anger
Oxford Mail: Angry florist angry over new car park signs
He needs to calm down a bit. Somebody send him some flowers.
Friday, May 21, 2010
Phone line anger
Reading Evening Post: Taxi firm to sue BT after phone lines are cut
Never mind that. Is that a pony tail?
Spotter's Badge: Nowtas
Litter anger
Southampton Daily Echo: Furious resident fights back against fast food litter by ...err... dumping litter inside fast food restaurant
Yeah, I can see the point where you surrender the moral high ground, pal.
Speeding anger
Monmouth Today: Angry residents raise petition for speed humps
Never mind the speed humps - how about some climbing gear? That's one hell of a mountainside you're on.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Football fan anger
Southampton Daily Echo: Football fan fed up after council order to remove England flags
I've just heard the new version of Three Lions, and I'm going to support Germany in this World Cup until the people responsible are rounded up and exiled to a small island without any electricity.
Pothole anger
Welwyn and Hatfield Times: Councillor's fury at pothole menace
Superb crouching from the Lib Dem stalwart.
Crappy house anger
Royston Crow: Ill woman upset after council move her into craphole
She's getting a voucher. Whoop.
Spotter's Badge: Alan
Roadworks anger
Reading Evening Post: Roadworks leave caravan dwellers with rat infestation
And being only eight inches tall, they're all bloody terrified.
Spotter's Badge: Nowtas
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Landslip anger
Belfast Telegraph: Residents demand answers after landslip totals local street
Sorry pal, don't look at me.
Bad e-fit
Warrington Guardian: Man wanted for attack on woman
This scrote thinks it's fine to attack women. We think he's a tit in dire need of a good kick up the cludger and bloody ugly to boot. Call the police if you can help.
Don't have nightmares.
Dog poo anger
Wrexham Leader: Mum's anger over dog mess on school run
I'm sure poo hopscotch will take off in time for the 2012 Olympics.
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Vandalism anger
Dorset Echo: Fury as vandals wreak trail of destruction round tourist park
They even put this chap's train through the wash at the wrong temperature, and now look at it. I'd be severely "dis-chuffed", too.
Care home anger, again
Bournemouth Echo: Yet another update on the camera-shy people of Swanage and their attempts to keep a local care home open
Don't fancy yours much
Museum closure anger
Macclesfield Express: Disappointment, only slight anger as Silk Museum to close
No more shall the smooth, smooth silk play across warm, yearning thighs …err… as you were
Cycle access anger
Hendon and Finchley Times: Anger as posh people can't get their bikes down cycle route
It's like living in a police state sometimes.